One of the greatest tragedies that can happen to practically everyone is not a sin, as we usually think. Sin, if not habitual, often shocks us so much that it can even become a sort of springboard to sanctity. Contrition and deepened humility open us to God and love grows.
Far worse is the most common affliction – a sleep of heart and faith. These two usually fall into the deadly coma imperceptibly and gradually, as if overcome by a slow acting drug. We may go through the motions of religious practices, keep traditions and support the Church, keep out of trouble, too – but the freshness of “first love” and the joy of closeness to the Lord is lacking. The soul no longer dances in front of the Arc of Covenant. In prayer, we drag our sleepy feet and seek “worthy topics” for our conversations with Jesus. Our acts of mercy are dull and devoid of happiness that normally accompanies helping others. We become judgmental and begin to notice more evil than good. When we say “Our Father”, we no longer see our brothers and sisters of all races and ages.. We also begin to seek, even subconsciously, “the first place”, not the last one. Later on we even demand it, albeit with many excuses that our sleepy hearts gladly offer. We must take the “first place” because dignity of the institution we represent might be harmed if we took the “last one”, or because we have earned it through education, scholarly or other achievements, or because we are older and wiser.
The sleep of heart is more common and dangerous after we reach 40s. As we age we become more entangled in the ways of the world, more experienced and more wealthy in the material sense, too.
God comes to wake our hearts and faith in many ways. Sometimes he allows us to fall and suffer the consequences. At other times He waits patiently till the time when, oppressed by aging body and failing mind, we begin to realize we are not immortal. There is nothing healthier than realization that soon all our worldly gains will vanish, that truly all that we have produced, written, spoken is “straw”.
There are yet other things that can wake up a sleeping heart.
Beauty of nature provides the gentlest of awakenings and is freely available, if we only allow ourselves a moment of contemplation. A sweet song of a bird waking up in semi-darkness of the morning, the snowy peaks of the Alps or the Rocky Mountains seen from the plane, magnificent and misty. The silvery olive grove across the green fence of the La Giustiniana station when one returns from the dusty, hot city. A drink of crystal clear water from the street fountain by the Piazza Venezia. A magnificent 12th century church of St Cuthbert in Darlington. A bear cub, looking down from the tree in Canadian woods. A smile of a little girl riding on her father’s shoulders.
All it takes to wake the heart is to realize that everything that is good and beautiful originates with God. Everything is the gift of His love to us – the child, the bear cub, the singing bird and the water, the olive trees and the talent of the unknown builder of the splendid medieval church.
Glory be to God, the Father, the Son and the Holy Sprit..