“The whole of the Law is summarised in the one commandment: You must love your neighbour as yourself” says Jesus. Than He adds: “If you go snapping at one another and tearing one another to pieces, take care: you will be eaten up by one another”.
How well our God knows us unless we love, we tear one another to pieces.. there is no middle way.. and if we chose to “snap at each other” we cannot stop – and truly end up self-destructing.
There is a certain order of loving – ordo caritatis. Love is a chain reaction. We must love and accept ourselves. In order to be able to love ourselves, however, we need to have experienced love as infants and children. It is a known fact that neglect experienced in early age results in psychological wounds that linger for decades, if not the whole life. Even minimal amount of love, however, in almost any form, lessens the damage.
In the book “Boy raised as a dog”, a famous (now) psychiatrist describes a small boy, who after death of his grandmother who initially raised him, was placed by his grandfather in a crate – with the dogs which the old man bred. When the child was finally found by social services, he was unable to speak and was developmentally delayed. Not as much he should be, considering the circumstances, reminisces the psychiatrist. And the boy responded to the therapy quickly, he adds. Why? Because of that one priceless year of love and attention his grandmother had given him..and also that bit of attention he had from the dogs.. The seeds of love were sown.
Psychology, with all its practical wisdom, does not “know” everything. There are miracles of healed hearts and minds that take place all around the world all the time. They happen whenever the psychologically wounded men and women, children and old people turn to God.
Even the worst type of neglect can be reversed when we open ourselves to God and talk to Him, weep before him, share with Him our fears and joys.
God is the source of all love. No atom of love is ever lost. We are loved by God through ourselves, through our neighbours, by animals and sometimes even by our enemies.
Love is this is the type of currency that never loses value. You may think that a child you had always loved and cherished and prayed for is lost – grown up and turned “bad”. You weep when you see how he or she hangs out with the wrong people, smokes, swears or worse. Never give up hope and never stop loving. Love is a seed that sometimes takes time to grow. In some cases it may take a lifetime to grow and will bloom on the other side of eternity, in God’s garden. But it will grow and it will bloom.
We simply cannot afford to stop loving.
Maria Kozakiewicz